Dancing Through the Decades: Your Weekly DWTS Recap

Tonight the dancers will perform TWO complete routines, one with a certain decade theme! Remember Joanna and Derek’s futuristic Paso Doble from last season (vid above!)? Phenomenal. There are only five couples left, and next week is the semi-finals (already? I can’t believe it), so let’s start that sprint to the finish line.

BALLROOM ROUND

Chad Ochocinco, Tango: I’m excited for this! Chad does a great masculine dance, and has good footwork. His butt’s sticking out a little. Every mistake counts people! It was a little all over the place and Chad looks a little disappointed. “Good attack,” says Len, but it needed a little more “polish.” Agreed. Chad’s not off to a great start, and his Jive later may suffer.
Score: 7, 7, 7

Niecy Nash, Viennese Waltz: If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it 100 times. This dance is so boring. But Niecy just livened it up with a beautiful spin! She’s gliding across the floor! She looks like rainbow sherbet, but good for her! That was really cute, and light and fun. Ugh, Carrie Ann has to be such a downer. Talking about transitions and yada, yada.
Score: 7, 8, 8

Erin Andrews, Argentine Tango: I have a feeling this is going to be Erin’s best dance. The Argentine Tango is so precise and sexy and I feel like she’s due for a breakout dance that’s just perfect. Oh she looks mad, not a good face Erin! Oh shiz! The jump she just did was RE-diculous. Off the stage and on to Maks’ shoulder! And into a back bend! Seriously, she should get great marks just for that lift.
Score: 9, 10, 9 (Len’s a sucker for a leggy blonde)

Evan Lysacek, Waltz: Last week’s 30 is going to be hard to top. So what do Evan and Anna do? They go ice skating. Now Anna’s telling Evan he needs to be more romantic. So they start the dance laying on the floor. I don’t know about this one. Woah. A boy sit spin! I’ve never seen that! That was really pretty – and I felt like Evan did a lot of hard moves that guy’s don’t usually do. (Why is Vera Wang in the audience with Kim Kardashian?)
Score: 9, 9, 9

Nicole Scherzinger, Foxtrot: Nicole’s a little neurotic, no? She’s very insecure about how people are viewing her. I feel bad. Great song – can’t do a bad Foxtrot with Michael Buble. Oh this dance is making me so happy! This dance is exactly what I think life should be like…people singing and dancing through the streets! This might be one of my favorite DWTS dances ever! Loved. It.
Score: 10, 9, 10

LATIN ROUND

Chad Ochocinco, 60s Jive: “You gotta pimp hard,” says Chad. Hilarious. I think if he can move his big frame fast, he’s gonna be fine. Except, he’s dressed like Dennis Rodman. I think Chad’s sole purpose of being on this show was to meet Cheryl Burke. He’s seriously smitten. And that was a cute dance. But I don’t think it was great technically.
Score: 8, 8, 8

Niecy Nash, 90s Paso Doble: What is a 90s Paso Doble? Kurt Cobain chasing bulls? Mase and P. Diddy wearing long skits? This is going to be interesting. I feel like she did the solo parts really well, but was a little shaky in hold.
Score: 7, 6, 7

Erin Andrews, 80s Rumba: I feel like anything in the 80s needs to be funny, and the Rumba is one of the more serious dances. So this could be weird. Oh god. There’s leg warmers involved. I wish Erin and Maks could have dated in the 80s because they look like the picture-perfect 80s couple you love to hate.
Score: 8, 8, 9

Evan Lysacek, futuristic Cha-cha-cha: “Maybe my hips will be better in the future.” Haha. What’s with these costumes? Is that a Britney Spears cordless mic? Oh no, its just face paint. That’s was good. But I don’t know if it counts as a Cha-cha. What will Len say? Len’s stuck because it was great, but Evan was dancing as a robot, so it didn’t have to be fluid. I get it Len, I get it. Carrie Ann likes it for the robotic motion. These judges are so confusing!
Score: 9, 8, 9

Nicole Scherzinger, 50s Paso Doble: Hmmm. I’m stumped by this one. But if anyone can put this combination together, Derek can. I’m so excited!! Oh I love it. It’s like American Graffiti meets bullfighting. I think Derek’s really making his bid for a part in Footloose. Intense Paso with a little flair. I love when Carrie Ann is at a loss for words. She’s not grunting, but I still think the score is going to be AWESOME. I smell another 30.
Score: 10, 10, 10 (called. it.)

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