I’m sorry, but if this guy isn’t Joe Biden then I don’t know who is.
So I’m at my friend Katie’s bridal luncheon the day before her fantabulous wedding in Houston last weekend, and the woman sitting next to me (we’ll call her Trish, because that is her name) says that her husband looks exactly like Joe Biden. I smile and laugh because hey, he could look like anyone and this woman is sweet and also throwing the luncheon so I don’t want to make any enemies. But in the back of my head I know my dad tells people I look like Angie Harmon, so I also know that people’s visions of their loved ones is skewed.
I remember this conversation the next day, at the actual wedding, and I search and search the crowd for any vice-presidential lookalikes. I see none. I now think that Trish is just some sweet Southern lady who wanted to be rebellious and tell her new twenty-something friends that her husband resembled one of the country’s leading Democrats. I love Conservative Texans. They also frighten me a little.
However, things started to get seriously cray cray when I went to get in the buffet line at Ousie’s Table (seriously, the best mac and cheese ever) and lo and behold, Joe Biden is standing right next to me looking all serious in his black suit. I forget for a moment that this isn’t actually him. I then spot Trish, give her the “one moment” sign with my finger and dash across the dance floor for my camera. This needs to be documented.
The following is the actual conversation I had with Trish, her husband, a.k.a. Joe B. Houston and their son:
Me: So, your husband looks exactly like Joe Biden. I had no idea.
Trish: I told you so!
Me: Yeah, but I didn’t believe you. I actually thought you might have been a bit of a looney toon.
Trish: nervous laughter…
Me: to Joe B. Houston We’re taking a picture.
Joe B. Houston: And your name is…
Me: Kelly. This is my friend. Her name is also Kelly. Picture. handing my camera to Trish and Joe B. Houston’s son Thanks.
So we didn’t discuss fiscal policy or Afghanistan, but I can say that our interaction was amazing and I think we formed a lasting bond. Mostly because I think Trish and her husband are probably at home right now reminiscing about the time that crazy person accosted them while they were innocently trying to make their way through the buffet line at a wedding. But honestly, even if he was the real Joe Biden, it probably would have all gone down the same way. Whether you’re the vice president or a mild-mannered wedding guest, I have no sense of decorum whatsoever, and all I really just want to do is take pictures. This guy’s just lucky I’m not making a kissy-face, or worse, giving a thumbs-up, which apparently I do now.