“Tell the pilot to drive safely, he has very precious cargo.”
That’s what my mom says to me every time I get on an airplane. Usually though, I’m not trying to jump out of said aircraft.
Tomorrow, my friends, is the day I will finally “jump out of a perfectly good airplane.” This precious cargo is ready for the Big Drop.
A lot of people have asked “why the hell are you doing this?” I have a pretty simple explanation for it. Basically, I got dumped, cried about it for approximately three months (o.k. possibly longer, possibly currently crying), and then decided to throw myself off of something. Fortunately, I wanted a parachute attached to my back.
The timeline breakdown of this ingenious plan goes as follows:


