Tag Archives: Things That May One Day Kill Me

Tomorrow Will be Too Hot to Function

There’s a heat wave making its way through the East Coast, and everyone is mad about it. I’ve run out of dresses to wear and have somehow finagled a questionable pencil skirt/tank top combo that is keeping me somewhat cool. People are pouring sweat on the streets (well, not in Cleveland Circle, where they just take their clothes off). Stores and restaurants are overcompensating with freezing cold air conditioning. And apparently Boston.com is predicting that it will be so hot out tomorrow – comparable to some kind of nuclear reaction – that only your sunglasses will save you.

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Bikers’ Rights! And Other Reasons Why I Could Never be a Hipster

Hipsters Patrick and Brian. It's Patrick's birthday, and to celebrate Brian wore the American flag. Obvi.

Last weekend was magical. I headed to Brooklyn by way of the Lower East Side to celebrate the impending nuptials of one Miss Katie Poff. We ate barbecue, we went shopping, we laid out by the pool, we even watched some episodes of Laguna Beach on DVD.

After watching the sun set over the East River and behind the skyline of Manhattan we did some shots of Goldschlager and headed out to the bars. It was at this exact moment that I was almost rundown by a violent hipster bike-rider who was angry that I had so brazenly taken my stroll into the bike lanes of the unreasonably wide Williamsburg roadways. “Bikers’ rights!” he yelled as he whizzed past me, ringing a bell situated on top of his handlebars. “I’m pretty sure I’m allowed to exist anywhere!” I screamed, adjusting the bachelorette masquerade mask on top of my head and refusing to move. My indignation then led me to actually run into a swerving hipster who just so happened to get caught up in the fracas. “That was dick of me, I’m sorry,” I told her. She just shook her head. Let the hipster hating begin.

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Scenes from the Green Line: My New Favorite Website

We all remember T-pocolypse 2011 a few weeks back and how the entire Green Line shut down and the Mass Pike was a parking lot for hours all because someone fainted at Arlington Street station during rush hour. It still keeps me up at night. Well apparently I’m not the only one whose life has been turned upside down by the MBTA system (actually, if we want to get existential about it, we could all probably say the T has ruined our lives in some way, butterfly effect, yada, yada, yada).

One Joey Brunelle (a.k.a. lead designer and developer of Goose Rock Design, where they “make awesome things”), a Kennebunk, ME native, has started the website How Fucked is the T? (HowFuckedistheT.com) which gives live data on where all four of the MBTA subway lines are at any time of the day, which basically shows that during most of the day the T is late, shut down, broken, sucking at life, etc. This has become my new favorite obsession.

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