Tag Archives: Movies

Birth Watch 2011: Natalie Portman and her Teenager for a Baby

So, it’s been quite awhile since we saw Natalie Portman and her very, very pregnant stomach at the Oscars in February. And over a month ago, I had a very long conversation with my friend Audrey about how Miss Natalie can’t possibly be pregnant for very much longer. Well, she still is, and quite frankly, I think people should be a little more concerned about it.

Natalie Portman has been pregnant for about 17 months now, and while I am certainly not a doctor (although I did put my cold symptoms into WebMd today and I most definitely have SARS), even I know this is way too long. She is a tiny girl, and if this baby grows inside her any longer, it may just overtake her body and use it as its own (this is the most accurate description of childbirth I can give you). This could mean a great loss to the film community, since Natalie, as of late, has become the only actress that stars in movies anymore.

So if you see her in the street tell her to get on with it already. If not for her, or her baby, then for the sake of Thor at least.

Update: Natalie Portman has given birth to a baby boy. This blog surely was the catalyst.

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Filed under Oh Baby It's a Wild World

Bridesmaids: Kristen Wiig’s Answer to Christopher Hitchens

So, you think we're not funny?

We all know that Christopher Hitchens doesn’t think women are funny. Either that or he wrote a Swiftonian-esque proposal in that January 2007 edition of Vanity Fair. Either way, his disdain was palpable.

Like any other 20-something female you may run into this week, I went and saw the movie Bridesmaids over the weekend. And after resurrecting Hitchens’ opinion piece online today, I can’t help but picture Kristen Wiig, four years ago, throwing this particular issue of VF across the room, sitting down at her laptop and ultimately penning what, by general consensus, has become the funniest “chick flick” of all time, because it seems to me that Wiig has taken every point that Hitchens tried to make and blew it right out of the water. And has done so in heels, no less.

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The First Rule of Fight Club is You Don’t Send the News Station Video of Your Fight Club

This is basically what a 6th grade boys bathroom looks like.

I remember being 12 years old. And thinking that the boys were soooo weird. And I always knew they were doing something strange in the bathroom. But it turns out it’s something very different than what I thought.

According to the Daily News, nine sixth graders from Stewart Middle School in Tacoma, WA were expelled this week after school officials learned about the students’ ongoing bathroom “Fight Club.” Officials learned about the club from the local news station Q13 Fox News after the station obtained video footage shot on one of the student’s camera phones.

The Daily News reports that the video includes two middle-school aged boys involved in a full-on brawl. The boys’ faces are blurred out, but from what I know about Fight Clubs, one of them is definitely the alter ego of the other. The school district issued expulsions to all students involved in the fighting. They then expelled themselves for not knowing that a serious Fight Club-like situation had developed in their own bathrooms.

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Filed under WORST Things Ever