Birthday Blog Post!

Kelly's second birthday. The battlefield.

Yes, the rumors are true. I’m now 28-years old. I remember one Jessica Simpson, in her prime, some may say, telling her parents that she was upset to be turning 23. Because it was almost 25. Which is almost her mid-twenties. Well I’m kind of upset to be turning 28, because it’s almost my 50s. Yes, this makes sense to me.

Twenty-eight felt very heavy to me, and I couldn’t figure out why. I usually don’t worry about my age too much, except for my 20th birthday when I had a serious meltdown, and when my mom asked why I told her it was because I knew I was never going to be a professional tennis player. I’ve never played organized tennis, and I’ve never been very good when I’ve tried. But for some reason I knew that 20 was the cutoff for any dreams I might have about winning the Grand Slam or returning a Venus Williams serve without it literally making a tennis ball-size hole in my stomach. Twenty is just too old to try to do something like that. Man, that stayed with me for days.

Continue reading

4 Comments

Filed under About Me, It's All Going In The Book

A Picture’s Worth 1,000 Words

I snagged this picture off the website for the photographer at my cousin Fallon’s wedding. Do not tell. And in exchange for your silence, I’ll let you help me decide which direction I should take the tele/screenplay that I’m developing based on said photo. Your choices are below. Choose wisely. The future of American culture is in your hands.

Continue reading

5 Comments

Filed under BEST Things Ever, The Crazy People I Call My Own, The Funny Thing About Family Is That You'll Always Be Related

When GChat Conversations Go Terribly Wrong

Photo courtesy of The Daily Beast

It seems to me that more and more frequently, my well-intentioned gchats with one Audrey Marks veer off into a realm of absurdity that most sane people should really stay away from. Fortunately, we’re neither sane, nor do we think that any of the things listed below are absurd or ridiculous. Just as we believe our future band Oh, Hey Girl, which only performs cover songs of famous cover songs, will be extremely lucrative and one day lead to an E! True Hollywood Story two-part special. (You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one.)

Today’s object of conversation, Joe Kennedy III and a meteoric rise to the White House for a new, modern version of Camelot. I cast myself as first lady, obviously. And, go.

Continue reading

4 Comments

Filed under The Crazy People I Call My Own