Category Archives: WORST Things Ever

If Bristol Makes it Through Tonight’s DWTS Elimination, Sarah Palin Will Be Our Next President

Photo courtesy of ABC.com

Isn’t America just one big reality competition anyway?

Yes, I’m projecting that, should Bristol Palin’s unfathomable rise through the TV landscape continue after tonight, her mother, Sarah Palin, will be elected president in 2012. And in case you thought I’d just throw that statement out there with nothing to back it up (which I do on occasion), here are my reasons:

1. Conservative/Christian voters: After 8 weeks of dancing (and countless years watching the show), I’m fairly certain that Bristol’s fanbase is everyone in Alaska (minus maybe Levi Johnston) and all registered Republicans. Should she move through to next week and say, Kurt Warner gets the boot, she will probably pick up the Christian sect, which might just make her unstoppable. Sound like any Tina Fey look-alikes we know? On top of that, I’m sure there’s some people out there that vote for Bristol in the hopes that she’ll fall flat on her face, and some fun can be made at her expense. Again, the same could probably be said for her mother.

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Filed under TV FANatic, WORST Things Ever

So I Think My GPS is Trying to Kill Me

He may look innocent, but he's not.

I’m kind of in love with my GPS. When I was working as a reporter on the Isle of Long, driving down backroads to find fires, murders, and government officials getting DUIs, it always got me where I needed to go. But recently, I think it may have turned on me.

It always had its little quirks. Like it takes a really long time to find a signal. And it goes to night vision pretty early in the day. But in the past few months, it’s begun to turn on by itself (without being plugged in) and start talking to me. What’s more, when this happens, the GPS usually begins giving me directions to a place I did not program in, and no matter where I am, that place is always at least 2 hours away. What other conclusion is there? My GPS is definitely trying to kill me.

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Scenes from the Green Line

Advertisement at the Arlington Station.

Dear Karen and Neil: I hope you don’t take the T. Love, Kelly.

Something about this makes me think Karen and Neil are the Angry Engaged Somewhat Happily Married Couple. Update: I saw the dynamic duo on the train last week looking worse for the wear. Later that same day, I saw Somewhat Happily Married Man half asleep in his Metro paper. Guess the honeymoon really doesn’t last forever. If only they knew they were blog celebrities!

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Filed under Around Town, WORST Things Ever