Tag Archives: Humor

Soooo Pimp

According to ESPN, Florida’s Miami-Dade county will have a new name come July 1. Call it Miami-WADE County, in honor of the Heat’s greatest player, Dwyane Wade, obviously.

In a unanimous vote on Tuesday, county commissioners decided on the week-long name change “in recognition of all that Dwyane Wade has done for the visibility, stature and national image,” of Miami-Dade. But as ESPN also reports, Wade becomes a free agent on July 1, and clearly this is all a ploy to keep him with the Heat. How can you not stay in a county named after you?

“It’s about who can come to Miami,” Wade told ESPN.com on Wednesday. “It’s about who do you trust, who can fit the organization, who best fits you as a player, things of that nature.” So this county name change is not going to cement your decision to stay or go? Shocker.

Here’s to hoping Miami-Wade/Miami-Dade sets a precedent for future county name changes. When I become rich and famous, I want Orange County, NY to become Orange You Glad Kelly Lived Here County, NY.

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Filed under BEST Things Ever, Wide World Of Sports

As Always, Dreaming Big

There’s no such thing as a silly dream. There are, however, silly bbm conversations:

Ke​lly Carroll: If I had to sing karaoke, I would want to do Lady Gaga, Telephone. But only the Beyonce part. Like I would be featured in someone else’s karaoke
Au​drey Marie: I like this
Au​drey Marie: I would let you be the Beyonce to my Gaga but I’m not much for singing karaoke
Au​drey Marie: Maybe Biz is your Karaoke soul mate
Au​drey Marie: Or Dan Ankeles
Ke​lly Carroll: Hahahahahahahha
Au​drey Marie: He likes Karaoke, but specifically Neil Diamond. I don’t know how he feels about Gaga.
Ke​lly Carroll: Um, last time we chatted his favorite song was Kei$ha, Blah, blah, blah
Ke​lly Carroll: I think he’d be game
Au​drey Marie: Bahahaha
Au​drey Marie: I love it
Au​drey Marie: The dynamic may be better with him as Beyonce
Au​drey Marie: But I understand–you are always Beyonce
Au​drey Marie: We should float this idea to him. I like it.
Ke​lly Carroll: I am Beyonce always

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Filed under About Me, BEST Things Ever

You Can’t Handle the B-E-E

The title of this photo is Spelling Monster. Thank you, Fox News.

Get ready for one of the greatest sporting events of all time that doesn’t require any physical exertion whatsoever, unless of course you win and you’re super nerdy and you do a weird half-jump, half-dance combination. That’s right! It’s the Scripps National Spelling Bee!

Oh my God, I’m so E-X-C-I-T-E-D! For years I have been tuning into the Bee solely to bask in its quirks and hilarity. I love when the kids ask for the language of origin. The concentration on their faces as they scribble with their finger on the back of those godforsaken neck nametags. The stumbling as they ask for the word to be used in a sentence. The Drama! The Intrigue! The Intensity! (There’s also a big chunk of time spent making fun of these er, spellers, because I was super nerdy, and I grew out of it – kind of, not really. So I have some license.)

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Filed under BEST Things Ever, Wide World Of Sports