Category Archives: WORST Things Ever

Narcissistic Question of the Day: Can I Pull Off This Look?

I think I look like Jay-Z.

In second grade I decided that I really needed to have glasses. So I pretended I couldn’t see the blackboard from my desk and my mom took me for a checkup with her optometrist. Vision: 20/20.

So I never got my wish. That is until this weekend when my cousin Sam gave me these awesome specs! So I wore them all weekend in Philly, because I know no one there that would point and laugh at me. But now I’m back in the real world and need to make an important life decision: do these glasses look good on me, or am I really just trying way, way too hard.

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Filed under About Me, BEST Things Ever, WORST Things Ever

Is This Bruce Jenner?

So the New York office decided I didn’t have enough books in my cubicle and sent over a buttload of old titles for me to sort through (thanks, btw). Some of them are really cool, like a Roget’s Thesaurus from 1922. Others, however, are less cool.

For some reason my company has been hoarding pamphlets, written in Spanish, showcasing classic books. Each pamphlet has a caricature of an author on the cover. The one pictured to the right, I’m assuming, is supposed to be Harper Lee, and the pamphlet is about To Kill a Mockingbird (I’m guessing this from the pictures inside, as I cannot read Spanish. I blame Mrs. Shapiro).

But tell me, does it or does it not resemble a certain loveable former Olympian who may or may not have had too much plastic surgery? Obviously I’ve taken this around to every single person in my office for their opinion, and they all concur that yes, I am a crazy person with way too much time on her hands.

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Filed under TV FANatic, WORST Things Ever

Homeland Security Takes to Twitter

Bennie G. Thompson, photo courtesy of The Washington Post

I have this very real fear that the terrorists are going to one day use Twitter to take out Western civilization. I’ve discussed it before. No one really seems to care. And when I use the word terrorist, I don’t even really have a specific group in mind, just the notion that there are people out there who put bombs in Nissan Pathfinders/their underwear and try to blow things up.

So you can imagine how disturbed I was to receive the following e-mail this afternoon:

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Homeland Security Committee Now on Twitter

November 30, 2010 (WASHINGTON) – The Committee on Homeland Security, and Chairman Thompson, have started a Twitter Account! Follow us with news updates, press releases, links, etc. @ HomelandSecCom.

Link: http://twitter.com/HomelandSecCom

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