Tag Archives: Reality Television

Teen Mom and Eyeliner, the Untold Story

Over the past few years, I’ve done my best to avoid shows like 16 and Pregnant and Teen Mom, because they depress me. However, recently I’ve become intrigued by Teen Mom 2, the second season of MTV’s beloved (is beloved the right word here?) series. After some serious over-analysis of the show’s first two episodes, I have a few observations I feel need to be shared:

1. Most of these girls are southern, right? They have southern accents, so I’m assuming they are. But sometimes when I drink tequila I get a southern accent, so this is not a definite. Sometimes when I’m really drunk I can speak Spanish. Hola.

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Is This Bruce Jenner?

So the New York office decided I didn’t have enough books in my cubicle and sent over a buttload of old titles for me to sort through (thanks, btw). Some of them are really cool, like a Roget’s Thesaurus from 1922. Others, however, are less cool.

For some reason my company has been hoarding pamphlets, written in Spanish, showcasing classic books. Each pamphlet has a caricature of an author on the cover. The one pictured to the right, I’m assuming, is supposed to be Harper Lee, and the pamphlet is about To Kill a Mockingbird (I’m guessing this from the pictures inside, as I cannot read Spanish. I blame Mrs. Shapiro).

But tell me, does it or does it not resemble a certain loveable former Olympian who may or may not have had too much plastic surgery? Obviously I’ve taken this around to every single person in my office for their opinion, and they all concur that yes, I am a crazy person with way too much time on her hands.

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Top Chef All Stars isn’t F-ing Around

Joe Jonas, the foodie. Photo courtesy of Bravo.

If we’ve learned anything from last night’s episode of Top Chef All Stars, it’s that a) chefs are deathly afraid of children and b) anyone, and I mean anyone, can go home.

In the Quickfire challenge, the cheftestants were asked to prepare a snack for little kids staying over at the American Natural History Museum, guest starring Joe Jonas. Asian Dale: “I had no idea who Joe Jonas was. I thought he might have been a pastry chef?” And then Dale stole all the sugar and everyone got pissy about it.

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